Happy 15th Birthday, Lutheran Chick #2- proof that Mourning and Dancing live together

Eight years ago, our world was re-scripted in ways we could not imagine.
Fifteen years ago, my world was changed in ways that still amaze me- our younger daughter burst onto the scene. This year I am so proud that she has joined in founding an Interact Club at school- the hight school version of Rotary International. Next summer she hopes to travel with People to People, an organization whose very existence dates back to post- WWII and Dwight Eisenhower's belief that peace can happen when people take the time to experience one on one relationships with others around the world. So for my peacemaker, this is a re-post from a couple years ago- without diminishing the importance and profound nature of the losses on this day, please remember that others are the new life that remind us that death and evil do not have the last word:

This week people across the nation marked the sixth anniversary of the tragedies which unfolded on September 11, 2001. September 11th holds another importance to me- my younger daughter was born on September 11th and was an elementary school student in 2001 when the world seemed like it was falling apart.

It was, in the tradition of the school, her day to be the line leader and the snack person. And it all started out like any other great day. And it is almost always clear and sunny on her birthday, as it was that day.

She had been dropped off with her cupcakes and dressed in red, her favorite color. Her older sister was also at school and my husband and I were at work. The way it worked out, my secretary was on a family trip ( about a mile from where the plane went down in PA). So I had public radio on and I was vaguely listening as I waited for a client to come for an appointment.

As the appointment began there was a report that a plane had crashed into the Trade Center but the assumption was it was a small plane. Hmm. The client came and we met. When I finished, I called our lawfirm’s main office and people were frantic. Get to a TV, they cried.

So, still wondering, I walked down the street to the coffeehouse and on the TV, the now infamous plane clips that are etched into our collective memory were rolling. I got a coffee and as people were wandering in and sitting down to watch numbly, the first tower collapsed. I watched it as though it was a surreal vision, but it had really happened.

They announced that the last plane was unaccounted for, but was over Pennsylvania. I felt like Chicken Little; the sky was falling. I frantically called my husband, and found out his government office near the school was in lockdown.

The school called and I was on my way to pick up the kids. Driving on a sort of auto -pilot. As it seemed was everyone else. My kids got in the car and it was as I saw the tear-stained face of my young child, I realized that for her this was as much about her day as anything else.

How much do you share with 7 and 9 year olds? They had heard the whispers of a few things. We talked briefly about what I could say, planes had crashed and people were not sure what had happened but that it looked like someone made them crash on purpose.

When we came home, my birthday girl was wondering why anyone would do such a thing. At the time none of us knew who was behind the attacks or why. But it seemed to come from somewhere in the Middle East. I struggled to find a way to explain why any person would embrace death in this way.

I started by saying that people do not always agree about where other people should be able to live, or what religion they can believe, or what people can say and who is in charge. I used the playground as an analogy for who gets to pick the game, or who gets to be on the swings first, or who solves a problem when there is a fight. And I admit that even though grownups tell kids not to act out, and to get along and share, we do not always do what we tell them to do. And so we argue and we fight, even though we shouldn’t. And we try to settle things the way we want and we do not take turns. And we push and shove.

Heads are nodding and I think I have made a connection. Perhaps a little too well. Because then the birthday girl points out that the difference between kids on a playground and adults is that “ when adults fight, the way they settle things is to kill.”

My eyes welled up with tears as I heard the truth of what she so boldly said- yes, sometimes this IS what adults do. And now.. what to say? To my saddened, disappointed bitter child who at age 7 knows us as we can be?

I tell her she is right, and that when people do this, it is wrong, and that it makes God sad. She laments that this is how things are. And suddenly I find a moment of good news. I ask her to think about the fact she is not the only person born on this day. That there are too many to count. And that if she and every other person born on this day says, “ I have had enough!” They can become the peacemakers. They can help to bring the change our world needs. They can work for peace, not just because it is right, but because they know how awful not having peace is. And all around the world, change starts because one person stops saying “there is nothing I can do” and starts saying, “ I can do something.”


So every year when we get to her birthday, we place flowers in church to honor the peacemakers in the world. And as the events of the past become further into history, the best hope we have of honoring memories is to work, pray and hope for peace. And when you remember September 11th, just as it evokes sadness, remember that there is life and hope and God’s promise.

Blessed are the peacemakers.

Friday Five- Las Mananitas

From Mother Laura over at RevGals, a birthday-inspired Friday Five.

1. When is your birthday? Does anyone else (famous and/or in your own life) share it?

October 2nd. Sting,Groucho Marx, Gandhi and me. Hmmm..see them all Here. Kelly Ripa is there too. I am a few years older than her. I don't know why I am not on this list. I went out to Youtube to find a Sting video and found this version of Panis Angelicus with Pavarotti. Who knew?



2. Do you prefer a big party or an intimate celebration for the chosen few?

Somewhere in-between. Girls just wanna have fun.
3. Describe your most memorable birthday(s)--good, bad, or both.

My husband ( before he was my husband, when we were law school students) to me to a very lovely restaurant way out of our price range for dinner and a wonderful jazz show. The music, food and company were wonderful, seeing his guess about which silverware was for what, also entertaining. Never really had a bad birthday. I am born the day after my Dad, so there were a lot of combined birthday things growing up. Actually, there was one bad birthday. It was when my husband was commuting back and forth to Philadelphia ( about 4 hours a day) and it was just taking its toll. He had forgotten to get me anything for Christmas until it was too late to ship, followed by missing Valentine's Day, and then he came home from work on my birthday, in a bad mood, clunked around all evening, and went to bed. No "Happy Birthday", no card.. nothing. I was wondering if I had done something wrong- He had just totally forgotten. Shortly after that he changed jobs, ditched the four hour commute and life got much better for everyone. Was trying to forget that one.

4. What is your favorite cake and ice cream? (Bonus points if you share the cake recipe). Or would you rather have a different treat altogether?

Chocolate cake with raspberrry filling, or carrot cake. Not sure which, but I'll have to get out a recipe.

5. Surprise parties: love 'em or hate 'em?

I think it would depend. Never had one. I once had a co-worker who planned a getaway for him and his wife to Aruba for her birthday. He made all of the arrangements and packed her bag. Woke her up at 4 am to go to the airport and "said it's surprise." Turns out he didn't really pack what she needed, and there was the whole, he already packed her makeup so she traveled "scary" .. not sure I want that surprise.

Bonus: Describe your ideal birthday--the sky's the limit.
We would all hop on a plane and fly to London to take in the museums, and a show and maybe a pub crawl.